Mick Brady: Lyrics

Grandaddy was a ladies' man

It was Wham!, Bam!, Thank You Ma'am

He knew all the girls down at Le Club Exotique

You could find him there any day of the week

He had his own special seat just in front of the stage

Had to sit up close on account of his age

When he died and his will was read

It was a shock for the the family when they heard what it said

 

Paint my coffin whorehouse red

Lay me out on a king-sized bed

Topless dancers on an all-night vigil

Play some brassy music that'll make them wiggle

I want chorus girls in FM shoes

For a guard of honour for my last move

Take my ashes out on the town

Scatter them all around The Pussycat Lounge

 

Now a man's last wish is kinda sacred

A hundred dancers came, they were all half naked

He was looking good in his Playboy shroud

Everybody said he would have been so proud

It was all about glamour, it had class, it had style

And old grandad – he lived the way that he died

The preacher said it shouldn't be allowed

But we had to call the cops to control the crowd

 

Pole dancers crying salty tears

Wiping their eyes with their tiny brassieres

It got a little bit emotional with those sweet, sweet gals

When they had two minutes silence for my grandad